Triple Masked Ronald McDonald Accused of Evicting Children From Restaurant Play Area
Crazy masked clown evicts Canadian children
Vancouver, BC - In a surprising sequence of events. Has been clown, Ronald Fitzgerald McDonald, was allegedly seen yesterday, triple masked and screaming anti-vax obscenities at children while physically evicting them from a nearby play area at a local Vancouver, BC restaurant.
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"Not in my house," yelled the clown in muffled rage, colored balls-a-flying! Screams could be heard as parents fled the area, children in tow.
"I was playing on the slide, and all of the sudden I saw Ronald McDonald. I was so excited so ran over to give him a big hug. I wanted to ask if he would make me a balloon animal. That's when he asked me for my vaccination card. When I told him I didn't have one. He started yelling and saying bad words. Next thing I know. He kicked me with his giant flat shoe. I got scared and ran away."
Most of us remember Ronald McDonald from our childhood. The tall happy red-headed clown always brought joy to boys and girls everywhere. He got his start on TV in 1963 and was loved by all until his decline around the early 2000s and eventually, for reasons unknown, his removal from the Clown Society of America late last decade.
As of this writing, there has been no public statement made by Ronald McDonald or the restaurant manager.
* It's Satire Stupid! 🤡
Now Lets Learn The Story Behind the Satire
We saw a story (linked below) that was going around about a 4-year-old little boy with leukemia whose family was kicked out of the Ronald McDonald House because he wasn't vaccinated. This level of evil is just disgusting and the catch 22 that this charity put this poor family through is absurd.
Their flawed logic:
You can't get the vaccine because you're going through leukemia treatment. But you can't have a place to stay because we require you to get the vaccine so that you have a place to stay while your innocent little boy is getting leukemia treatment.
These disgusting companies that put their blinders on and wholesale enact these draconian rules out of fear of litigation are the downfall to society.
Therefore, we decided to point out this absurdity using satire and parody, and that's why we wrote this article.